Productivity

I have learned that my habit of keeping fabrics, quilt blocks, and etc. for years is a good one to have. For example, these 2 Dresden Plate rings were given to me during one of my grandmother's Great Cleanings of Her Sewing Room. I appliquéd them onto black fabric, folded them up, and stashed them away.
Years later, they make a fine wedding wall hanging, even though the purchaser just realized she told me the wrong date! Seam ripper, ahoy!
The tiny little squares making the borders are from a bag of fabric scraps Tiny Montgomery picked up for me. Thanks, TM! Even though the rings are from the 1930's or 40's, and the squares are from the 60's and 70's, they work well together.
Thus was my Friday morning. Oh, and when I let the dog out at 3-freakin'-AM, guess who was getting into his hot tub? That's right....my hoosier neighbor. I love South City.

*stomach churning*

First, here is what I have growing in my yard. Thank you, Dollar Store! My pink and white gladiolas from last summer are amazing this summer. You must drive by my house to enjoy.

And now for the stomach churning....
May 11th, 1987
Monday
Dear Tippy, (name of my mom's childhood dog)
I got my ears pierced today. BAAAAARRRRFFFFF!
First, the earrings were soaked in alcohol, same as my ears.
Second the doctor marked 2 x's on my ears.
Third (very barf), He (ugh) took a needle and screwed it through my ears. It didn't hurt that much but I really winced at it.
THEN, he threaded another needle and ran it through my ear. OUCH!
Then he stuck the earring in. YOWCH! My earlobe is so fat! I almost barfed I was so nervous. I had to lay down. Dr. Sugden took my pulse. I must have been white. I couldn't keep steady for a while. It was THIRTY bucks!

Daddy is in a very bad mood just because he didn't get dinner in the living room. He got all pissy, threw pans on the floor, stomped all over the place, threw out a lot of pictures and one of his photo albums from the Navy.
Good lord.
G'night!


Let's remember, my parents said it was this way or no piercing.So, my mom sat in the doctor's office, with her hands over her face, because she was unable to watch me be tortured. I didn't write what the second needle and thread did. He pulled it back and forth to make the hole a little bigger for the earrings. Even now, my stomach is doing flipflops remembering how it felt. Believe it or not, worse is yet to come in The Earring Saga.

Needless to say, when I got the other 6 holes done, it was at the mall, sans parental consent (it was the 80's). It took my dad 6 months to realize I had gotten more earrings.

As for the finale of this diary entry, I looked up emotional abuse, but it doesn't fit what happened. This stomping and yelling and freaking out over minor things was a weekly event for a while. Who knows what was really wrong?
We Walkers are pretty strong-willed. When we're pissed off, we are PISSED OFF. For example, when Tom broke my heart into a million billion pieces, I didn't speak to him for 4 months, even though we saw eachother each weekend at The Model. He spoke to my roommate and friends, but I totally ignored him, even if we were both waiting for drinks at the bar. Finally, I got over him and was cordial again.

You gotta watch out for we quiet short people. There's a lot of malice simmering inside, and not just from the brutal way our ears were first pierced.

*blows dust off diary*

May 9, 1987
Dear diary,
I don't want to play my flute in church. Dad asked why I never play it at home. I said, "I don't want to." So now I can't get my ears pierced! I want to die or just stay up in my room forever! I have to plant ALL the goddamn onion sets. I hope the birds eat them all.

Ah, I can just hear Big Mike saying, "Well, I guess I don't want to pay for your ears getting pierced!". Also, a typical punishment in the Walker household, once we were too old to be spanked, would involve physical labor. No wonder I can't sit still when I'm outside. I always feel like I have to be doing something.
This also may mark the first sign of teen-hood: "I want to die!"
For those who did not grow up with a garden, onion sets are just teensy tiny onions that you plant and wait for them to become regular onions.
The whole issue with ear piercing was that it was 1987, and my parents thought if I went to Piercing Pagoda at the mall, I would get AIDS. Instantly.
So, it was off to the doctor's I went., clueless as to what would befall me.Stay tuned!

The Universe

One bit of good news....I have nine of these that will be blooming in a couple weeks. Remember, I paid one dollar for a bag of 10 bulbs last year. Now, I have many, many more.

And now, a warning--whining ahead!

Today, I believe the universe is against me. Twice today, TWICE, I yelled,"Oh shit! Please stop! Please stop!" to other drivers.
On Forest Park Parkway, the car in my rear view mirror did not appear to be slowing down and I was at a red light. The hair on my neck actually stood up, and I imagined my precious car being crumpled. Luckily, Drinky McGee did stop, an inch away from my bumper. Then, once the light turned green, he zipped around me on the right. A few lights later, he realized he wanted to turn right from the middle lane.
Sounds stressful, eh?

THEN, I find out another one of my friends is pregnant. I'll leave it at that.

On the way home from school, a tractor trailer pulled out in front of me on 55 south. I'm cruising along, at the speed limit, and saw the truck with its blinker on. "Oh, he's not REALLY going to pull out. Surely he can see there isn't enough room for him to get in front of me oh shit he really IS coming into my lane from a dead stop oh crap!"
By some stroke of luck, I did not smash into the back of the Lane Furniture truck, and the car behind me was paying attention and did not smash into me.

Oh, and the reason I signed up to teach summer school? Nonexistent. At least I'm just teaching art, to 3 classes of 8 students each.

I've had way too much adrenaline today. Someone else go run my errands. I'm staying inside.

Drawers

I know I'm a bad person, but I couldn't resist this photo opportunity.
That clothing, basking in the beautiful setting sun? Why those would be the boxer shorts of the former owner of Little Jerry Seinfeld: my hoosier neighbor.
His yard starts behind the basketball hoop. It's got the hot tub, non-running vehicle, 18 lawn chairs, 2 patio umbrellas laying around, and 3 broken park benches that you can't see. Plus, a child's blue plastic truck thing. You can't see the other pile of children's toys.
NO CHILDREN LIVE THERE. HIS NEICE AND NEPHEW ARE TOO OLD FOR PLAYSKOOL TOYS.

Training Babies

Not, not teaching them tricks; I mean like a training bra training baby.
I got to hold this one today:
www.xanderlucas.blogspot.com

and got to feed this one on Memorial Day:
http://luckybeesbazaar.com/home.html
For some reason, the pics of that baby are no longer on the blog, but buy some cute pouches!

Thinking further, wouldn't a training baby be a good thing? I mean, they're all heavy and sweaty and drooly and mercurial. It would really solidify one's desire to be a parent, especially if that "one" is a lonely teenage girl.

Since my last "if you post it, it will sell" trick worked (thanks, Robin!) here is what I have for you today:

It is a full-size-ish unpadded summer quilt. Just 1 layer of the quilt top stitched to a backing of heavier cotton upholstery fabric. It was made at my MIL's house during the December ice storm. I had an idea of what it would look like, but didn't have the space to lay out the blocks to make sure that they looked good together. It turned out pretty awesome!
This might be up for silent auction later on this month.....stay updated!

Oh, and I am officially on Summer Break. Envy me, you might, but I am teaching art at summer school, so break will be short lived/profitable.

Update for Matt

Even though my husband is on the other side of the wall, he wants an update.
So, in a numbered list:
1. Gypsy Caravan was DRY, thanks to all my creative visualization. If you watch this clip, you'll see not only my badass grey streak, but how eloquent I am after hours of watching frontbutt and American flag shirts.
http://cw11tv.trb.com/news/kplr-052807-4,0,3042563.story

Please note that I am identified as Becky Rabbit, even though I emailed the reporter to correct it.

2. I had a great corndog, which came with a face. See above. And no, it is not possible for me to take a decent picture.

3. I have 12 hours of work left, and am trying to suppress the urge to throttle certain children. As I said to R. (of Chilicraft fame), "I am trying to remind myself that I love you a lot" as I grabbed the back of his neck. With love, people, with love!

4. My garden shows promise of another banner year. My basil appears to be 2 different types, but once you chop that bastard up with pignoli and olive oil, it's all good.
I have many volunteer tomato plants if you want tomatoes.

5. My grandfather will be 97 tomorrow. NINETY SEVEN. And I'm all wistful this morning about when I was 24! Such folly! That man still remembers Polish from when his parents were alive and non-English speaking!

6. No Lisa, I could not be any cuter. Do you like my corndog photo?

7. I am working summer school so I can go to Maine in August to visit Kate. If you need new potholders, buy some from me and contribute to my Maine Fund. I want to eat as much seafood as humanly possible while I'm there.


8. I tried to take some photos this afternoon with our new digital camera, but.....yeah. I don't quite have the hang of it yet. Note that I said NEW, and that I haven't blogged in a while.

9. I swear to you all I will get back to my diaries on Friday! Or I will buy the Monday Moms at Hartford all coffees!

10. Time for a rum and coke.

Yowza.

I know, I know...slacking and such.

1. I've been reading a blog in which the newlywed author hates her new husband. What happens in a marriage to make 2 people hate each other? Why do people start being so mean to eachother? Is it the comfortable-ness of marriage? "I'm used to you now, and we're married, so I can start treating you like crap"? I don't know. It makes me sad and a little worried. I know I can be intolerable sometimes, but M. hangs in there. Thank god he's a social worker!

2. The brother of a student died in a go-kart wreck Sunday. The student moved to another school in January, but most of our students knew and liked the boy who died. It's been a rough week.

3. There is a baby bunny living in our rapidly-growing bushes. It ran across my bare foot the other day. I believe it is responsible for a new grey hair.

4. Tiny Montgomery and I walked the dogs tonight. Maggie jumped in 3 different bodies of water in Tower Grove Park. Clean, clean, and stinky and murky. Needless to say, she got a bath when we got home.

5. This really pisses me off: Last week, my teacher friend and I went to Kansas City for a teaching conference. Since we had some time to kill before getting drunk in our chi-chi hotel room, we went to the Mega Marshall's at Zona Rosa. I bought a tres cute shirt, and since it was only $7, I didn't try it on until we got back to the hotel.
The freakin' sleeve did not go past my elbow! It barely made it past my wrist! Now, I'll admit, my upper arms are kinda fat/muscular. But my forearm? WTFH?
Here is a pic demonstrating my outrage:

I had to take off the band around the sleeve. Naturally, the REST of the shirt fits, although I can't wear it to school unless I want to put on a boob show if I pick something up from the floor.
Who is this shirt made for? I am not a big girl. My arms are fairly normal sized, if not small. And by normal, you know what I mean. Don't get up on any damn soapbox, cause there isn't room for you up here. I have reconciled my butt to a larger size than it used to be. My belly shirts are safely packed away. But my forearm?
I enjoy food, a lot. Good food, McDonald's, comfort food, sushi, you name it, I'll eat it. I am not a picky eater (except for Long John Silver's. Never again. ). I've even started eating salads from Bread Co. again, after almost eating a ladybug hiding in the lettuce.
WHO IS THIS SHIRT MADE FOR??? WHY are clothing makers sizing their clothes so freaking small? What the hell is wrong with the designers?
I worked in a garment factory for a year. I made samples, drafted the patterns, wrote the sewing instructions, etc. All the measurements have to be in a decent ratio to eachother. Not so in my tres cute shirt.
And so I vent.
Come see me and Tiny Montgomery on Saturday at the Tower Grove Farmers' Market. I'll bet Poppymom will be there, and then your Blog Celebrity List will be complete!

All about me, and then you

Thanks, Robin!

Allison:
1. I never understood how you wound up in Boston after growing up in rural Pennsylvania. Explain.

I wanted to go to college as far away from my parents and idiots from high school as possible. University of Washington (state, not DC) didn't want me, and Princeton was too close, so Boston U. it was.

2. When did you learn to sew, and why?

I guess I was about 5. My mom got tired of me begging her to make dresses for Barbie, so she showed me how to hand sew. I still have all the old 1970's/1980's doll patterns. Heck, I still have all the rad clothes I made for Barbie.

Eventually, I graduated up to the Singer. I used that machine until 1993, when it broke for the last time.

I also spent a lot of time with my mom's mom, Grammy, who made wedding dresses and quilts. It sounds hokey, but one of my earliest memories is playing with fabric underneath a quilt that had been stretched out on a frame and was in the process of being quilted.

3. As a 7th grade English teacher, what's the most entertaining example of 'tween behavior you've witnessed?

Oh lord, I have to pick one? Well, my first year at BW was marked by having to write a referral on a boy who, as I put it, disrupted my class by "stimulating ejaculation". He had a hacky sack or something, and was pretending to copulate with it. As soon as I realized what was going on, he started pulling out the stuffing and throwing it at girls, while making ejaculatory sounds. Porn in the classroom: the only way!

4. When are you going to make that aging punk rocker survey/meme/bulletin, and can you give us a preview of some of the questions?

You might be an aging punk rocker if:

1. You read Sassy.

2. Wore red lipstick and thought it made you look "artsy"

3. You owned more than one pair of black Chinese mary janes.
4. You were goth before it was a store in the mall and was associated with massacres, Marilyn Manson, and was ripped off by fashion designers.
5. You wore black leggings and baby doll dresses, with aforementioned Chinese mary janes.
6. You burned candles in wine glasses and thought it was "artsy"
7. You loved 120 Minutes.
8. You now sell all your old "rad" outfits on Ebay.
9. Heck, you now sell vintage finds from estate sales on Ebay.
10. You fondly remember the first (and best, IMHO) Lollapalooza. I still have my t-shirt. Is it ironic yet?

That's about all I got. Once I started writing them down, the well dried up. I'm still trying, though.

5. That night that Matt was screaming, "You've gotta take me to Jack in the Box!", did you take him?

Yes. There was no other option. He ended up NOT eating all the crap he ordered. But it did make for an entertaining story.


Now it's someone else's turn to play if they wish: Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.” I will respond by asking you five questions in the comments here on this post so check back here. I get to pick the questions. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

In other news from Squaresville, my hoosier neighbor has a rooster roaming his yard/alley/neighborhood. It was given to his sister. I don't mind it, but I wish he had a pen for it.
Me and the St. Louis Craft Mafia will be in force at Gypsy Caravan on Memorial Day. Come see us and hang out in our tents.
I love Chicago. A lot.
It's raining!

Gross.

So, I'm standing at the kitchen window, eating grapes, and wishing it was a more reasonable temperature (i.e. NOT 34 degrees), when I spy a squirrel sitting on the fence, eating something red.
"Hmm.." I thought, "even if he did get into the compost bin, there wasn't anything red in there. Lemme get the binoculars."
The squirrel was eating a bird, and I can only hope that the wings were moving because it was very windy. He left bird parts on the fence. He had blood on his little mouth. I used to think he/she/they were cute, but now?
Who knew that squirrels were carnivores?

In other news, 2 of the girls who I wrote about in my diaries have found me on Myspace. Do I need to go back though ALL those posts and change names? I'm sure that they are mature enough to realize that we were just twerpy 13 year olds and time heals all wounds. Gah.
My regular computer died, and I am using M.'s old laptop hooked up to my regular monitor. Therefore, no gross pics of bird guts, but you know I would if I could.

Chilicraft--The Afterburn

I'll make this fast, since I broke the camera and have no pics to share.
I felt Chilicraft was a good success, considering I had a month to pull it together, and it was hot.
Here was my day in a list:

1. Wake up tired.
2. Get to school later than I had liked, because every single stoplight from South City to U. City turned red when it saw me coming. Marcia calls; I try to sound cheerful and unpanicked.

3. Roll up to school. Vice principal is there, as are several other crafters. It is quite warm.

*added after list was made* Patrick from Meshuggah does indeed bring me my large vanilla latte, even though I said he didn't have to. I lord it over Tiny Montgomery, who anxiously awaits the first brew of coffee. The good thing about student volunteers is that you don't have to lift a finger. "R.! Go see if the coffee's ready!" and off he trots. It was.

4. 5 of my male students show up at 8:15 am on a Saturday to help me, even though I had pissed at least 3 of them off the day before. They are wearing their team t-shirts, or navy blue shirts and are charming and carry heavy stuff for my crafters.

5. I am mumbly and confused without coffee. One boy, D., takes my seating diagram and directs the table set up and placement. He tells me to go away and that he can take care of it.I grunt thanks and unload my car.

6. The district turns off the AC and heat on the weekends. We get R. to climb up the closed bleachers with a tool to crank the windows open. He enjoys any chance to show off his muscles to a room full of women.

5. Beqi arrives, crabbing about the worst birthday ever and a speeding ticket. My students assist her in unloading and uncrab her.

6. The kettle corn man shows up, and speaks to me from his van. He is unsure if he'll do the fair or not, since I am not Dionne Warwick and cannot predict how many customers he'll have. He smells funny, and I sense that he is not the type of man I want around my students. He tells me he'll make some calls and let me know. In 5 minutes, he calls me FROM HIS VAN to say that he's going to St. Ann instead.

7. I pace the room, entertaining crafters, and am nervous that nobody will show up and we will make no money and my friends will hate me.

8. People show up, we make money, and my friends love me.

9. Matt's chili is among the first to get sampled into extinction.

10. Other students show up and work my booth for me. They are good salespeople, and sell a lot of raffle tickets.

11. Most folks go home happy. Cranky Cricket gets invited to the Best of Missouri Market, which is awesome news.

12. I "get" to climb up the closed bleachers and crank the windows shut myself, even though I am scared of heights. I develop chameleon-like suckers on my hands from gripping the wall so hard. I don't look down. I sweat a lot. I get the windows closed without falling 15 feet onto the gym floor and snapping my neck in the now-pleasantly-scented corner Morgan's Naked Soaps was situated. At least I would be soothed by the faint cloud of lavender.
I have to sit on the top bleacher for a minute until my arms stop shaking and I can get the courage to climb back down the closed bleachers. I assure my principal I'm fine, mentally cursing the 2 girls who didn't show up for their shifts. Women, man....

13. My principal is pleased with me, and I feel the best I've felt in a LONG ASS TIME.

14. Now I feel weird, since a parent of a possible future student is reading this. Hi Bev!

15. I shower, nap, and then go to poppymom's for wine and cheese and telling funny stories about chipmunks and knives and the North Rim of the Grand Canyon.

16. I come home, find Matt already asleep, but pull a 20-something thing and lay in bed with him talking until 2 am.

17. I worry about what bad thing will happen to delete my euphoria.

18. I sleep.

19. I wake up and wonder if my friends embarrassed me in front of my students or vice versa.

20. We think we hear someone at the front door and yell that we are sleeping and to come back later. It was just the wind.

I ate no chili.

Chilicraft!!!

Yes, the Chilicraft is almost upon us! Start starving yourselves for the taste-off!
One of my students drew up a more amazing flyer than this yesterday. I will have to scan and post his. I almost wept, it was so creative and awesome.

So, if you're interested in the mayor of Squaresville, come on over to Brittany Woods to sample chili, spend a lot of money on awesome clothes by Beqi, jewelry by Tiny Montgomery, cute little purses and change purses by String Theory, and more and more.
Heck, here's a list:
1. Beqi Clothing
2. marciamenendez.etsy.com
3. sherrybingaman.etsy.com
4. superchickstudio.etsy.com
5. Crankycricket.com
6. Luckybeesbazaar.com
7. aogstudio.com (wicked awesome glass things)
8. cateanevski.com
9. smallthingsbandb.etsy.com
10. Soul Diva trading (yum...shea butter stuff! I shall be soft!)
11. Stringtheoryshop.com
12. Morgan's Naked Soaps (a craft fair isn't complete without a soap person)
13. Tiny Montgomery
14. Of course, myself, squaresville.etsy.com

There will be kettle corn, Meshuggah Coffee, and many of my darling students to entertain you with their banter. Oh yeah, and a raffle contest!
*sigh* now to sleep. Hopefully no tornado-themed nightmares tonight. Last night, my dream killed off the guy Kate is seeing. I mean no harm!

More pics

Me and Mom in the parking lot near the Art Museum in Philadelphia. Note the tell-tale grey streak that proves I am her child!

Me being circled by seagulls. Yes, that is snow piled up in the background. Note my cool wonderful.etsy.com t-shirt! Hi Megan! We had great pizza and a cheesesteak calzone at a little pizza joint in this strip mall.

Matt and some other kid pretending they're Rocky.

Matt and 2 other people pretending they're Rocky.
My dad helped build one of those tall buildings in the background.

Me and Mom not pretending we're Rocky, next to some girl whose boobies are escaping.

It was totally fun to hang out with my mom for the day. I wish we lived closer, so I could chill with her more often.

Spring Break

So, I spent the greater part of this week either in Pennsylvania, or on I-70.
It was great to lounge in my parents' house and eat good home cooking. Mom and I went to an "antique" mall and I ended up with these:







Each piece was $1.00, and the polka dot scrap was a mere quarter! Click on the fox/bird fabric to decipher the wording. The orangey-yellow and yellow/purple squares had old quilting lines marked on them, which sort of came out in the wash. I think they'll be fine for potholders, though.
Of course, a visit to the greater Philadelphia is not complete without a stocking-up of Tastykake products and good coffee.

More pics to come once Matt emails them from his computer to mine.

Mmmm....Tastykakes....









Oh yeah, I also scored this supposed McCoy planter. It is an exact smaller version of one my mother has! Neither one is marked, but both have similar flaws. I lurve it.

love/hate

I was inspired to do this by Blackbird's blog:

I love white chocolate.
I hate white bread.

I love cinnamon dulce lattes at Starbucks.
I usually dislike anything cinnamon.

I love the shape and colors of squid.
I hate the idea of eating squid.

I like cocktail sauce.
I dislike the texture of the shrimp one dips into cocktail sauce.

I love Irish bars.
I hate cigarette smoke in bars.

I love the early morning.
I hate having to go to work in the early morning.

I love shopping at Target.
I hate actually buying things (too frugal for my own good. Or my wardrobe's own good.)

I love listening to music.
I hate going to see bands because of the cigarette smoke, the late hours, and the standing. I have varicose veins, people! Give this old lady a seat!

I love my husband.
I like being alone in the house sometimes.

Nothin' Much

Look how warm it is! I'm in 2 shirts, no jacket, and the sun is shining! I look a hot mess, thanks to a night of drinking and watching "Bird"- the Charlie Parker biopic. It was pretty good, as was the 1554 Ale.



Why bother trimming these grasses when Maggie does it so much better? All winter, she's been rubbing up against the grass, slowly pruning it. Kind of like a big hunk of that meat Middle Eastern restaurants us. Is it kibbe or gyro meat?

Regardless, the dog is damned cute. She has created a little fort for herself, and will sit there watching the birds and squirrels at the feeders.
And now to sew more of these:


For sale now, at www.squaresville.etsy.com!

Sickness

For the past week, I've been coughing, a la 1996, when I had bronchitis. Back then, it was brought on by a Wednesday night gathering of my friends to watch Beverly Hills 90210.
I distinctly remember the episode. Dylan had just gotten married to that actress with the big eyes. There was a scene with him talking to his new FIL. Holly said, " Excuse me sir, while I go bang your daughter behind this bush." I spit out my beer and started laughing so hard I started coughing.
I didn't stop coughing for a month. My roommates were woken up in the middle of the night by me. I took a bottle of Robitussin with me to work and stashed it under the counter. I finally went to Massachusetts General Hospital and got some Robitussin with Codeine and some other little bath-bead-like drug which suppressed the urge to cough.
Wish I had some now. This is what my drinks of choice have been for the past week:


You will note they are almost empty. The shaky picture is indicative of how I feel. I got tired just making the bed yesterday.
The doctor put me on Amoxicillin, which makes it hard to leave the safety of a toilet. I don't know if I'm going to work tomorrow.
Anyway, the pretty blue medicine makes me have very realistic dreams about the most RANDOM topics. Things I haven't thought of in a decade or more! WTF?
Last night, I dreamt about 2 kids I used to babysit. Dennis and Jennifer L.. In the dream, I was talking to their neighbor. Dennis and Jen went to my church, and were among the throngs of Solebury Township kids I babysat. The neighbor was actually Jen G., which I found out after consulting my yearbook. Good times, good times.
Jen went to Boston University, too. I ran into her and her parents in the checkout line at Star Market one day. My hair was probably some bright red color, and knowing the year, I was probaby Cute Punk Rock/Hardcore Girl. Blue Doc Martens and all.
The other night, I dreamt about the albino deer that roamed Solebury Township. Daniel and I saw them, and were calling for our father to come outside to see them. One was the size of a Holstein.
God bless Tylenol.
On New Year's Day, I received 4 orchids from a lady on Freecycle. I have a bad track record with phalaenopsis orchids, but I decided to give it a shot anyway. Well, I am pleased to report progress:



I pruned the bud stalk just above the third node, and it has sprouted a new flower stalk! Do you see the baby leaf in the center of the other leaf?! They are perched on top of the medicine cabinet in our bathroom. Good, filtered light, humidity, and probably the most warmth in the house. I figure since they're used to being in a house, and not Target, they won't die.
I was in Chicago a few weeks ago, hanging with Alexis and whoring my potholders to chic stores in Lincoln Square. It was a great, great weekend. I'm always sort of worried that I'm one of those people who is constantly rehashing the good old days, to the annoyance of others. Not so with Lexi! She reminded me of many stupid things we did that I had forgotten about.
Saturday night, her husband was DJing at Club Foot, so we drank many Guinesses/vodka tonics and grooved to the strains of Charlatans, Echo and the Bunnymen, and the Descendents. I love how just one note of one song can instantly transport me 16 years into the past, into a warm summer night, into Lexi's ancient purple Volvo. Pavlov would be proud. One note of one song from "Songs To Learn And Sing" and I'm tasting watermelon Bubble Yum. Here's to the good old days, Lex!
Saturday after Hot Doug's, we went to Quiltology, and I left with these:



I know, I know, theyr'e Denyse Schmidt fabrics. Fabrics from my sworn enemy. But they're so dang cute! And they'll be perfect in potholders! Cut me a break!
Also, I'm still taking applications for Chilicraft. Please, please, sign up and help a sister out!

Remember zines?

I'm sure there are still scrawny punk rock kids who make zines. Lexi and I made 1 issue of "Bread". It rocked. My brother did "Milkshake" for a while. He drew a happy milkshake character which looks strangely like Shake from Aqua Teen Hunger Force. Dan's zine was done back in the early 90's, so THEY ripped HIM off, not the other way around. Plus, those guys are total idiots. I'm sure I'd have to wait in line to slap them around.
Here is what I just spent the last few hours on:


Pretty cool, huh? You like the tattoo lettering? I had to slip that in there somewhere.
So, if you're a crafter or a chef in the St. Louis, area, sign up!

Stalker Girl

I saw it today.
It went right past me, like I wasn't even there. Isn't that part of a Dag Nasty song?

I know it was the one. My sweet, cherished, blue Mazda, that I THOUGHT I was fully over.
Nope.
Just as "You're So Vain" came on the radio, I looked over, and in front of the SouthSide Bank, was the deer-damaged front quarter panel I knew so well!
It was headed south on Grand.
I will have to find out where it lives now.
Did it see me in my new Mazda? Was it jealous? Did it see me? Does it miss me?
I had to buy a new one! Matt wouldn't let me dump any more money into it! It's not my fault it got a cracked water pump!

Sigh.


Oh yeah, my birthday is tomorrow, and I expect chocolate, bitses!

Who Do You Love?

You all love me, and my silly, silly ways, right? You all love the spontaneous, flybytheseatofherpants Alli?
Well, bitses, sign up for my very own craft fair! I volunteered/was volunteered by my evil best teacher friend to organize a craft fair to benefit my school's PTO.
Yes, me. Organizatin' somethin'.

The picture to the left shows what happens when I organize Monty's morning glories and purple hyacinth bean. There's a headboard and footboard under that mass of leafy fence.











So, the deal, tentatively called Chili Craft, is March 24th. You're right, that isn't a lot of time. It'll be from 9 am to 2 pm at Brittany Woods Middle School, in our awesome 1956 gym. I might even be able to get tables for us. The booth fee is $35 plus 10% of your profits. It's a benefit, stop griping.
Are you a chef? Did you make basil jelly from this (the basil, not the scowl or boobs) :


There's more where that scowl came from! I know who you are, you knitters and stitchers and cutandpasters!
Help a sister out, wontcha? Let me know ASAP so I can impress the PTO on Feb. 6th.
God, that is a really unattractive photo, but it works in so many ways.

Now GET CRAFTIN'!

End of Year Summary

Allison F.'s comment made me laugh out loud, and I wanted to expound upon it.
Yes, we are old.
I am more interested in knitting or sewing than bands. If I get into a band, that means I'll have to go see them IF they play in this shitty town, and that involves standing in a smoky room with youngsters.
I actually passed up a Bouncing Souls show, because I didn't want to be the oldest person there. I didn't want to be the only person who knew them "when". We used to go see them at City Gardens, in Trenton, New Jersey. I bought a t-shirt from their old drummer. I still think they rock, and their newest album is great, but....ugh...the standing.
And college-age kids bug me, with their Uggs and perfectly emo-d hair and shirts with that happy bunny. Back in my day, we didn't have the luxury of Hot Topic to achieve our look. We had Allston Beat, Amvets, and The Garment District. Heck, growing up, I had NONE of that. It was The Pinwheel consignment shop for me.
I guess by age 30, I've lived my wild and crazy youth. That doesn't mean I'll never occasionally drink too much and puke out of the car. I'll wear a band t-shirt if I find one I like. But now, I know what Allison is about. I'm comfortable with my homebody, knitting, sewing, coffee drinking, traveling self.
I don't know where I'm going with this. I'm full of eggs over easy, bacon, toast, and diner coffee, and there is a pile of 4.5 " squares beckoning.

And Allison F., I too have a husband who watches football.

Post For Kate

Hi Kate!
Here is what I've been up to:
1. Knee deep in cottons for those dang charity quilts Robin and I keep stalling on.
2. Creating new garden via cardboard, compost and dirt.
So, I just laid down a cheet of cardboard, from the dinette set, layered leaves, compost, and dirt on it, planted the birdfeeder stake, and voila! My mother had done this a while ago, and now has a strawberry patch. She used newspaper, though. Eventually, I'll turn that whole strip of grass into a patch of tall, colorful flowers.
Oh yeah, I also dug up and reset those big edging bricks. I have calluses!

3. Enjoying my Winter Break, and already moping about going back to work.
4. Drinking way too much coffee.
5. Seeking, and thanks to Cat, finding my dream dinnerware set!

The pattern is called Blue Dandelion, and it's by Stetson China, in case you ever find a sugar and creamer set for me. My birthday IS coming, you know.
Also, please note I am not scowling in this photo. Pretty good for a self-portrait!
Kate, you will recognize this shirt, no?

Here is my favorite Christmas gift:

This would be a coral Christmas cactus from my beloved. Not red, not white, not yellow, but a gorgeous pale orangey peach coral.

Remember when I asked Santa for a table and chair set? Apparently Santa's name is Lynne. I have the greatest MIL around!

The dog was already here :)

New Year's Resolutions? Ha.
I resolve to go on a 1.5 week vacation to PA, Boston, and Maine to visit parents, grandparents, Gardner Street, and Kate.
I resolve to drink more water.
I resolve to stop wasting so much time on the computer.
I resolve to really get my little business cookin'. I made my first international sale yesterday!
So, a brief question, dear readers: What more/else should I sell? Keep in mind, I am but one person, with one sewing machine.
Let me know!

SNOW DAY!!! Wait...

So, I did The Happy Dance Thursday night, when my coworker called to tell me there was no school Friday. I stayed up late! I drank beer! All on a weeknight!
But....I woke up Friday, at 5:30 am, as usual, thinking it was a leeeetle cold. One look at my clock radio told me that it would be a long, cold day. No cheerful red numbers, no KDHX waking me.
Dear God,
You know I wanted a snow day so I could stay home and replenish my craft stock for Wintermarkt next Saturday. That requires electricity. So, why did you do this?

Now, I'm glad those ancient trees didn't fall across my street, or pull down the lines, but I really wanted to sew. I had laid in bed the night before, watching the blue flashes of transformers exploding, and hoping one wasn't responsible for my coffee, sewing machine, and radio. I prayed to you, remember? I thought about all the things I was thankful for. So, how do you explain this?

I am thankful that our house didn't get crushed by a tree, or that the wires in my backyard

didn't give up and snap from the weight of 2 inches of ice. I am lucky Matt's mom has an extra bed, even if it's in a small room with a million pieces of furniture (many with flowers). His mom is a lovable crazy lady. After all, she and I were singing along to "Let Your Love Flow" by The Bellamy Brothers this morning.
And thank you God, for allowing me to drive home Thursday afternoon in the ice storm without smashing my new car!
Love,
alli

So folks, sewing did get done at the MIL's house yesterday. I'll have enough stock to not look silly, and hopefully people will be eager to buy retro Santa Claus print oven mitts.
Come see me, Beqi, and Cat at Wintermarkt!

Everything Went Green

If you know me, you can easily guess my favorite colors. Green of all hues, and deep blue. It was painful to have to get a red car, but I've made it though the fear.
So, here is the color of our New Porch. A dark avocado-ish green.

Here is Matt, looking cute with a paint smear on his face.

Other than approving of the paint color, and periodically checking to make sure Matt hadn't fallen off the ladder and made me a rich widow, I spent all weekend sewing. And let me tell you, Rock and Roll Craft Show customers, if 55 pairs of potholders and 20 oven mitts aren't enough for you, then I don't know what is enough.
Besides the RNRCS3, I'll be at the St. Louis Vegetarian Society's annual Turkey-Free Thanksgiving, selling my wares. I know, I know, I'll eat anything with a heartbeat or a growing season, but I can't say no.
Beqi and I are selling at Wintermarkt, in the Skinker-DeBaliviere neighborhood on Dec. 9th. Last year was the only year it was painfully cold; we've always had decent weather before.
And then, I rest, until I get a wild hair to do a craft event in Chicago in the spring.
Always accepting old jeans,
Allison

On the 7th day, Allison rested

It hasn't been 7 days yet, but we're resting this weekend. By resting, I mean I'm sewing like a banshee and Matt is tinkering with the railing of the steps.
Here is what is now attached to our house;
You will note that the 300-lb concrete pillar, "Sir Lean-A-Lot" has now been retired. Since my dad was able to push it over with just a touch of his foot, I'm glad we're not relying on it to keep our porch from blowing off the house in one of the many tornadic storms St. Louis gets. Remember last January 2? After drinking cheap beer all day and watching a Star Wars marathon at John and Jenna's house, I awoke to tornado sirens at 5 am. Welcome back to work, Allison!
So, I dug a trench big enough for me to lay in (no exaggeration) and gave the pillar a proper burial.

Dad and I rolled it across the yard, and thankfully, it fit right into my trench, after crushing one of my fingers.
If you know me at all, you know I LOVE trash and recycling stuff. For instance, there is a teal recliner by one of the dumpsters as I type. I'm resisting going over to check it out.
I like how the post makes a nice border for the rosemary and dill. If the next owners don't like it, it's their problem. I'm not moving that behemoth again.
Here is the inside of the porch, from the kitchen doorway:

We're really excited to use the porch for dinner, breakfasts, and I want to be able to sleep on it in early summer. Matt bought 2 curtain rods for the windows you see above, as the streetlight shines right in.
Santa, bring me a hammock and a cute table/chair set!

Workin' Man Hands

So, my dad is in town, from Pennsylvania, with the intent to build us a new covered porch. So far, things are going smashingly. I took the day off from work and did this:
That whole pile of old porch? Neatly stacked in the garden. What about the dirt Matt dug up yesterday for the concrete pilings? Yeah, I shoveled all that and spread it around the garden.
The new porch is 8' by 12', and if you don't think pressure treated decking in 12 foot lengths is heavy, you're a moron.
In the above photo, I've captured the rarely photographed Big Mike. My dad's pretty badass for 59. Here's what the end result of today is. Don't let Maggie fool you, she just laid around all day and watched us.

It was pretty surreal, roaming through the new Lowe's with my dad. I had multiple flashbacks of being 6,10, and 15 and in the same scenario. Dad mutters to himself about the plans, we can't find 14' planks, so we have to get 16-footers, I had to go back and get angle caps, but got the wrong size, I hold the board while he bashes it just a teensy bit more into the hole in the house...did I mention my hands are inches away from the bashing tool?
All my life, Dan and I helped build things with him. We were the holders, the flashlight shiners, and the weight. "Go get your brother and stand on this thing". Today was really awesome, even though I was cold. I wish I could take the rest of the week off and be a little girl again, holding heavy things and fetching tools and looking for the elusive 9/16ths wrench that grew legs.

Dull update

So, as fate would have it, here is the excitement of the night: Patrick from the Tower Grove Farmer's Market called me to see if I was available for a taping of the farmer's market by Show Me St. Louis. He said they wanted to interview a vendor, and I was his FIRST CHOICE!!!
But, once again, work drags me down. They're filming at 1:30 tomorrow afternoon, when I will be in 5th period/The Henhouse.
Goldang it.

On a brighter note, my dad is driving out on Saturday/Sunday to rebuild our hoosier-fied porch!!! In this pic, can you see the lean? It's like an M.C. Escher drawing. Disregard the crazed moonflower vine, unless you want some seeds.

He's making it just a smidge longer, and infinitely more stable. It's been a long time since I've played helper to Dad on one of his projects. Our family tore down and rebuilt an addition onto our farmhouse, and then we tore down and rebuilt a 3-car garage. We also tore down our barn after a windstorm blew out the side.
I am no stranger to nails or hammers or saws or "Come stand on this board while I run the circular saw mere inches away from your foot".
The other big news is the Tower Grove Harvest Fest this whole weekend. Autumn and I will be selling our wares (if I get any done). Come stop by-I should have some Chrismasy potholders for your holiday delights.
Jeez, I don't think I have one picture where I'm not snarling at the camera. I swear, I look much happier than this!
Oh, and GO CARDINALS!!!!!

I want a piglet

This is so freakin' cute, I had to share.

*blows dust off diary*

Well, dear readers, I've finished several sewing projects, and instead of rebuilding my stock for the Harvest Festival and Rock and Roll Craft Show 3, I'm on the computer, giving you what you want.

May 6, 1987
Dear Nancy,
Hi. Sorry. Today the sun actually shone and so I wore shorts. Mom picked me up from school and as a nice surprise, took Dan and I to Dilly's Corner for ice cream.
Yesterday Dad fixed the valve core on my bike. H. asked me if I wanted to ride along the canal path to Limeport. So I said maybe, because my bike was sick. Today she says, "I don't know if I'll have my bike back by then?" She better not have lied to me!
C. likes Chris C. He has a humongus hacienda! But it seems every time I look at him, he's looking at me. Oh dear.
Mom and Dad are planning to go to Ireland this summer.
Bye!

Ah, the ever present plan to go to Ireland. It fell by the wayside, along with the computer, rebuilding my 1967 Mustang, a new car for me upon college graduation ( I got $90 and "Eat something, will ya?" from Dad).....we Walkers love to plan, plan, plan.
Dilly's Corner was a little ice cream/snack shop right at the bridge over to New Jersey. I probably had a blueberry milkshake, made with real ice cream, real blueberries, and real milk. They also had good cheese dogs.
H. lived along the New Hope Canal, which followed the Delaware River down to Morristown. Mules used to pull barges along it, but when we lived there, it was a bike/walking path. Actually, I think you could still take a mule barge ride.
Chris C. was a hot item for most of my high school years. Last I saw him, he had a big neck and had obviously been working out 30 hours a day. He was one of the smartest kids in my grade, quiet, and had a good sense of humor. He was a BMX-er. Chris was one of those kids who want to be millionaires by the time they're 25, and I bet he was close.
The first wearing of shorts was a big deal for me, because my legs are/were blindingly white. I may be responsible for several holes in the ozone layer. I was SO self-conscious of it, but never resorted to fake tan, thank god. Even now, my legs never tan. I get a few freckles, but that's about it.

In Which I Offend Many In The Name of Humor

Dang, I hate working. If anyone has any ideas of how I can still rake in the big bucks yet stay barefoot all day, please let me know.
No, I won't do that.

I've been inundated with special request potholder orders, including one for EIGHTEEN. Now, I love these repeat customers, but damned if I don't need to take a day off just to sew.

Things of Importance Since Last I Blogged:
1. None of my size 6 pants fit anymore, thanks to the potbelly someone glued to me one night.

2. My new students are nicer, but have funkier names. Taundalayaria. No, it's not a tropical disease. She goes by Tangie. Actually, I don't even know if that's spelled right. If she was Thai or Cambodian or Laotian, I'd understand. I once taught a Sourisack Pachanirisiri. He was a straight Crip, yo, but very respectful to me, and not just because I'm a Crip Killa.

2.5. I'm not really a gang member, if anyone accidentally gets here because they are one.

3. A frighteningly large percent of hits to this blog are from people looking for pictures of Girl Scout Cookies. Now, hell yeah, they're tasty, but we can wait until March, folks.

4. Poppymom and I went to a quilt show in St. Charles last weekend, as did hundreds of bikers and their leathery biker women. It was a feast for the senses.

5. Too many people made quilts out of dusty pink and blue in the 80's. We scoffed at these.

6. Baby accessories are totally cute, and I want you all to buy me cute baby accessories once I get a bun going in this oven.

7. I awoke last night in pain from what I can only guess was my right side wisdom tooth tearing apart my jaw.

8. I am in dire fear of getting them removed, even though I only have 2.

9. My mom informed me that my brother was 12 pounds at birth, not 10 as I had previously thought. Will my potbelly help make delivery of a huge baby easier?

10. Strange Folk Festival is coming up with a quickness and I'm panicking that I don't have enough.

11. I accidentally said, "I'm black on the inside" to one of my classes today.

12. If it makes it any better, we were discussing what the word minority meant,and I used myself as an example. A kid said, "But how do we know you're not mixed?" and I said the phrase before I could stop myself. It got several laughs. It IS a running joke among a few of my co-teachers that C. is secretly black, and was given this designation by A., a black teacher. C. jokes about it herself, and the other day, A. said I wouldn't know who Blair Underwood was because I don't watch black movies. It's all a joke, people! C. and A. and I are cool like that! But god help me, I said "I'm black on the inside" to my kids!

13. That pic of Bloods is really creepy. Like they really play guitar.