The Good Stuff 2

Aside from the last-night phone call telling me I had today off, not much to report on today. I attempted some sewing, but have no interest in it. What is wrong with me? If we end up having to adopt, I am going to have to make some damn potholders/money!

Here's something good.
In winter, I have tons of these little guys at my feeder:
This, my friends, is the dark-eyed junco. The yellow-eyed junco lives in New Mexico and Arizona because it's smarter and more in touch with the Earth Mother. They are just the cutest little guys, with their white tummies and the chicken-like way they scratch through the snow for seed. How do their legs stay warm?

A few months ago, I found a horrifying sight in the yard. A sparrow had gotten its greedy head stuck inside a feed hole of one of my bird feeders. It was flapping frantically and was too panicky to figure out how to unstick its head. I gently held its little body and took off the top of the feeder to figure out what to do. With a lot of gentle twisting and poking and praying that I wouldn't tear its head off, I freed the bird, who flew into the bushes, gathered its wits and flew off.

Their bodies weigh nothing and you never realize how thin their legs are until you've got a really stupid one in your hand. So, how do their legs not freeze solid?

New Bags!

I am in the middle of adding new market bags to my Etsy shop. Remember, they are pretty much one-of-a-kind, and so fabulous that they won't last long. I hope.

Tonight we may be going to the Meet Our Alderwoman Candidate party at Grbic's. She's my neighbor, so I already know her, but there are raffles and such. Plus, free door prizes!

I've been sickish all this week, but dragged myself to school anyway. By Friday, I could not get myself psyched for a day full of boring meetings, and even though I wouldn't have had classes, I still called in sick. Then, I stayed in bed until 10 am. TEN AM! That's when I know I'm sick!
My doctor called in a Z-pac for me, which is 30 doses of the antibiotic azithromycin in 6 convenient pills. It basically kills ALL the bacteria in my body, good ones too. So, let's hope I make it through the weekend without getting the vomiting, diarrhea, or yeast infections that are possible side effects. My life is awesome, huh?

And as far as the previous post goes, we got nothing. But, the ball doctor said it could take a year or so for everything to heal from the variocele surgery.
At least my house is clean for now!

Yowza!

First of all, a massive thank you to everyone who picked up a little Squaresville for the holidays. I am SO happy that you're helping me clean out my craft storage box!
Rock and Roll Craft Show was totally kick-ass, and then yesterday's Green Living Expo was also awesome! Thanks to you customers, I will be sending a fat check to my grandparents for Christmas. Grandpop is 96 or so, and Grandmom will be 89 in January. I know they struggle to make ends meet, as he is a retired farmer and she is a seamstress. They're on a ton of medications, heating bill, blah blah blah. Would you be happy to know that Grandpop recycles? And, he was excited to "put a woman in the White House" in the April primaries in Pennsylvania.
Anyway, Grandmom has been in her house since 1939, and it needs tons of repairs. Naturally, I sorta hope she leaves it to me in her will, because I have nothing but wonderful memories of baking, cooking, canning, cleaning and fabric-messing-around-with in her house.
I figure the money will come in handy for them.

Here is a picture so you can see my newest frock, straight from the bowels of Value Village:

I like it, even though the picture makes me look oddly-shaped. And why do I always have that "I'm going to kick your ass" look?

A Few Items

Well, it's the end of summer here in St. Louis. The garden has a mind of its own, and I am not too concerned about its productivity at this point. Scroll down for my delicious carrot harvest!
Testament to how much cargo space a Mazda 3 5-door has. This is a small rocker chair and in front of it is a 3-drawer plastic cabinet. Much thanks to Laurene for helping load and unload it!

A few months ago, Laurene also gave me some bags of top soil. I laid them down in my Kill The Grass Area to, well, kill the grass. Today I flipped them over and found two beautiful slugs. I like how I can see myself reflected in Slug's slime.


Carrot harvest. And check out that gorgeous pepper! It puts store-bought peppers to shame!

Other items to ponder:
1. Why does Loughborough Schnucks attract such a large percentage of Jabba The Hut-like humanoid blobs? I was totally depressed the other day after seeing all the troglodytes cashing their paychecks with their 34 children each. I mean, besides the girl who was on her phone the ENTIRE time I was shopping, and the women in sweatpants and size XXXL faded t-shirts, it was an okay experience. I like my Schnucks. But Jesus, what a downer otherwise!

2. What did I do before iced coffee?

3. Who wants to come harvest all my basil and make my pesto?

4. Who wants green bean seeds for next year?

5. Why do my neighbors insist on letting their yard grow to a foot tall? The newspaper on their porch finally disappeared/decomposed, but the gas tank is still there, surrounded by weeds. Plus, why do they leave their kitchen light on all night long so it shines into our bedroom?

Just some thoughts, folks. Enjoy this perfect day!

How To Waste Time

Where we grew up, we didn't get cable. It would have cost too much to have it wired in from "town". So, I miss out on many, many 80's video references due to my parents' tightwadness.

That is where YouTube steps in to school me about videos by David Bowie (referenced in Flight of the Conchords), Duran Duran, Kate Bush and yes, Star Blazers, which my brother and I were complete raving lunatics about.

This video explains all my terrible dance moves, even though I've never seen it before today and I haven't worn knickers since 1985.
Now, I do add what I remember from belly dancing class as well as some inspiration from Sassy Girl, who was a frequent patron of Mod Night back during my Drink My Face Off On A Wednesday Night And Make Your Roommate Call In Sick For You Days.

Yes, I did that and I'm only mildly ashamed. Don't judge me!

Goodbye to My Youth

So, I'm in the midst of chopping up a Rubbermaid totebox of old t-shirts. They are intended to become a t-shirt quilt, which I hope doesn't look too "kountry krafty".
Things are going fine, until I get to my Lollapalooza tee from 1991. *massive wistful sigh*
So many great memories! Freakin' Jane's Addiction from 20 feet away! Stupid boys Lexi and I went with! WEARING A DRESS IN A CROWD. 'Nuff said.


I'm wistful because that experience still seems so fresh to me, to be excited about:
1. seeing bands (even though I haven't seen a live band in like 2 years),
2. to be excited about cute, albeit stupid, boys (even though my 3rd wedding anniversary was yesterday)
3. to be looking forward to going to college in a Big City (Boston, baby!)
4. Life (even though I am about to get an HSG exam, which I will let you Google yourself)

I also sacrificed my ANCIENT U2-Boy t-shirt. That sucker was HUGE! Why did I think it looked okay? It would fit a family of four easily, yet I surely wore it. Tucked in, possibly tied in a knot...ugh...
I bought this shirt at Rice's Market, which was/is a giant flea market that my great-great grandfather, A.L. Rice, started eons ago in Solebury,Pennsylvania. He was named after Abraham Lincoln, btw. I was probably with Lexi and/or my brother when I bought it. I am mildly ashamed to say that it was originally tie-dyed, but had faded and then I dyed it pale green.

Regardless of the shirt's history, this album is one of my All Time Favorites. So gritty and raw, and Bono's head wasn't the massively inflated solar system it is today. In fact, the first song on"The Gold Album" by The Bouncing Souls, starts off with the same sounds as "I Will Follow", breaking bottles and whatnot.

Lex, this shirt's for you!
Upper Hand was a cute local hardcore band from Doylestown, PA. I tried to find a link, but the only one that looked promising was to some Warminster band's Myspace page. It involved a lot of black hoodies and screaming, so I spared you the emo angst.
The writing on the right shoulder is where...ahem....I had one of the members sign my shirt.....Ah, those Perkins' nights!
That's all for Memory Lane. Back to the scissors.

Back on the chain gang

One of my diary characters found me and has posted on "Jumping the gun, not rope"! Hi Scott! It makes me sorta nervous about these folks finding me, but it's all in good fun. City Gardens rocked! So dirty and dangerous and full of hot hardcore or punk boys from Jersey...what more could an impressionable, overly smart 18 year old want?

February 21, 1988
Sunday

See Feb. 18th. Jen called and said that afterschool Friday, a guy named Matt in 10th grade or so, went up to CT and asked her for my phone #. Then he got in a car with mike. I have no idea what's going on. I hope someone cute really does like me. It's about time!
-Al

February 22, 1988

CT told me everything. It could be MP! Jen and I are having a t-shirt contest to see who can wear the most obnoxious t-shirt. Yuch. My period is coming around March 1. My stomach hurts already. Everyone is getting sick. H. is on crutches for her knee. Mike went home sick today. Poor dear. Nina was in a bitchy mood today.
See ya,
Al
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1. Oh, stupid, stupid 15-year-old Allison.....it almost pains me to think that I was so sprung on Mike! And how sad (and foreshadowing of my love of The Smiths) to read "It's about time!"
Keep in mind, Sassy magazine hadn't come out yet, so I was still a Seventeen and YM disciple.

2. Funny, I don't remember having PMS symptoms as a young lass. I guess I did.

3. How would I know if Mike went home sick? My school wasn't that freakin' small!

4. H. had knee surgery, becoming the first of 3 close friends who had the surgery. Weird...

5. My garden is kicking grass and taking names! Photos to come!

From Under the Rock...

I know it's been a while. Blame it on the MAP test screwing up my schedule and happiness!

The 2008 Garden is off to a good start. I planted a bunch of various flower seeds last weekend, as well as a pepper, German chamomile, onions, more spinach, lettuce and carrots. My corn has sprouted but I'm still waiting on the squash to germinate.
Photos to follow!
Let us go back in time, my friends:

Feb. 20, 1987
Today the YF went skiing at Elk Mountain. There is a new boy, Kevin, who is SO gorgeous. His cheekbones remind me of Mike's. OH MY GOD! Kindy was talking to a hot boy when Laurie and I got off the lift, and by the time we were at the top, they were at the bottom frenching. He's 16, name=Lyle. Kevin was looking at me so many times. Laurie and I sat in front of them on the way up and they (Jon K. and Kevin M.) listened to everything we said. Jon gave me a Cramps tape to listen to. Goo Goo Mah is the neatest song! I was listening to it and in between songs, I heard Jon say "Leave her alone, she's listening to the Cramps." And when we were at the place, Kevin kept on staring at me. He is so cute!
Love,
Al
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Okay, so my friend was a slut. A ski slut, no less. This never happened to me on a ski trip! There was a band trip later in high school where a local youth saw me and followed us around. Skateboarders....gotta love 'em!
I'm trying to figure out the logistics of getting off the ski lift, then knowing that the "frenching" was occurring when we were at the top of the mountain.....Kindy must have filled me in later. She did later go to the Catholic high school near us...
"Frenching". That kills me! Don't you think that frenching on a ski slope at night would lead to a painfully chapped face?
And god, was I acutely aware of who was looking at me and when! He was probably looking at me not out of teen boy lust, but out of wonder that I was such a rampant dork.
I still love The Cramps, and even had the classic yellow "Bad Music For Bad People" t-shirt, although its current whereabouts are unknown :(

Feb. 19, 1988

Feb. 19, Friday

Yesterday, C. and I were discussing what we would do if MP came up to one of us and said, "I want yer sex!" It was funny. Tonight I'm leaving to go skiing, so I won't write until Sunday. Anyway, today I saw MP again. Someone named Chris just called and told me that a boy in 10th grade likes me. I don't believe the, though. She (or he) said he's in the library 1st period on Wednesdays. Come Wednesday, I WILL NOT march in there and stare!! I'll send J. in.
Help?!
AL
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God, again with the MP. I was 15, remember. And again with the damned " I want your sex!"!! That song has cursed me!

I totally remember this conversation with C. I had a steady babysitting job after school for a woman from my church. I'd get home, pee, and she'd come pick me up. Nina had 2 girls-a 2-year-old and a.....maybe 5-year-old. It was fun, as the girls were good and they had a super cool haunted house. Plus, Nina and her husband had a Porsche 911, which she occasionally picked me up in. They bought it during the oil recession in Texas in the 80's. Remember that? All the oil farmers went bankrupt or something. Nina also informed the girls in the Youth Fellowship that if we ever needed birth control, she'd get it for us, since she was a registered nurse. I was in the front seat of Nina's car, coming back from the Youth Fellowship summer retreat. (Which was SO FUN, I can't believe I never wrote about it. I bought "The Joshua Tree" by U2 and hung out with older kids and watched "Witness" for the first time. Mmmm...Harrison Ford.......)
In the rear view mirror, I caught the eye of my older friend Betsey. We were a little shocked, but that comment cemented Nina's coolness in our minds!
When C. and I were discussing the improbable event of MP wanting to boink one of us, I was in Nina's kitchen. The kitchen had been the scene of several possible ghost encounters. Things would disappear from the top shelves, or you'd put a glass on the counter, go away and return to find it moved. It was dark outside, as it was about 5 pm in February. At the time, it was a really, really funny conversation. We were like, "What if we had sex on his skateboard?" and such. It seems kind of stupid now, though.

JM was slowly becoming my friend at the time. She was always willing to do my spying and I enjoyed her humor and sensibility. You will note that I didn't believe the person who called me. Perhaps JM was a good influence. She was a total Jersey Girl, even though she wasn't from Jersey. Big hair, weird clothes....very Jersey. Years later, her parents bought a brand new house and paid cash for it. They also got a Jaguar. We joked that her dad was in the Mafia, as they were very Italian. Perhaps we weren't too far off! Ol' Ralph was a made man!

And I guess I totally got my ski trips screwed up. Eh, you go to one Poconos ski area, you've been to them all.

Wardrobe Refashion Pledge

The Pledge

I, Allison___________ pledge that I shall abstain from the purchase of "new" manufactured items of clothing, for the period of 2 months. I pledge that I shall refashion, renovate, recycle preloved items for myself with my own hands in fabric, yarn or other medium for the term of my contract. I pledge that I will share the love and post a photo of my refashioned, renovoated, recylcled, crafted or created item of clothing on the Wardrobe Refashion blog, so that others may share the joy that thy thriftyness brings! Signed_Allison_____________.

Goodie! I can do the Value Village Half Off Day Sale! Look out, March 26!

Feb. 15, 1988

Feb. 15.
Today is Mom and Dad's anniversary. 19 years!
Today the 4H club went to the Sox Lady Factory. It was really neat! The socks are so soft and comfortable! Well, back to school tomorrow. School. I love it because I can see MP and CC (I think I love him). Father Figure is on. Lately, the snow has had a hard crust on top of it. So thick dad and Mom can walk on it. Anyway, Dan and I were sledding down Betty's barn hill. It was tres fun.. Brian H. now wears a leather jacket and iced jeans. MP has gym tomorrow. He is HOT!
Ta ta,
ALlison
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1. I am impressed that the Sox Lady is still in business!

2. Betty was our weird neighbor across the road. She lived in a huge farmhouse with several cats and doted on Daniel and me. She slowly went crazy, and wandered around our yard in her bathrobe a few times. I think there was more going on than I knew about, because why would we have her brother's phone number in our Rolodex? What did my mom know?

3. I tried to find a picture of "iced denim", to no avail. Imagine acid washed denim with a layer of frost on it. Am I the only one who knows what this was?

4. Brian H. was the mad genius of our class. I'm sure he's working on top secret government projects right now. I hope. He wore the typical "dork" clothes for years, until Santa gifted him with a leather bomber jacket, Led Zeppelin t-shirts and the aforementioned iced denim jeans. Ah, Brian H. So many good stories about him. Wait a few more years!

5. Snow day AGAIN today!!! Of course, I'll be whining about it on June 10, but it's nice now.

Caution! 15-year-old girl ahead!

Here is where my diary totally shifts in lovelorn teen girl-dom. It ain't pretty, folks, and I'm a little embarrassed to be sharing this with the entire world (or at least my 4 friends and husband who read this blog), but it'll be fun.
I think.
Apparently, nothing happened from the first day of 9th grade until February, because I skipped all those months. I do remember I got "Tango In The Night" by Fleetwood Mac for Christmas. I went on the yearly Youth Fellowship ski trip, where I heard The Cramps for the first time. It was super fun, and I got to sleep in an inflatable raft. That may have been my first time skiing.
Here we go.

Feb. 13, 1988
I started this diary almost a year ago. Wow. In one year, I have learned how to ski, swim, canoe, made an awesome volleyball serve, put in contacts, work a VCR, do proofs, survive during my period, annoy my parents and countless other things, even type. I don't like BC, I like one of his friends: M. P. I love him so much it isn't funny. I die whenever I see him. I would die for him I think.
I still have no hole in my right ear an I am getting soft contacts sometime next week. I had hard ones, but they hurt my eyes. I think I'll limit myself to one page a day. I bought tan pants today. C. had carved 666 into her arm and mastered the art of 5 fingers. Maybe she'll stop since AD and VS got caught. I love MP so much
-Al
* I drew a picture of the back of his head. It wasn't a good picture.*
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1. Christ. " I die whenever I see him"? WTF? I hadn't even started listening to The Cure at this point!

2. I was usually picked first for volleyball in gym class. It was my shining glory. I could hit the opposite side of the gym with my fearsome serves.

3. This whole MP thing started when C. developed a crush on him, and I tagged along for the ride. She was getting super weird at this point (i.e. self-mutilation) and I probably wanted to salvage our friendship. The infatuation gets a LOT worse, folks.

4. 5 fingers is shoplifting, nothing dirty.

5. My handwriting also is totally different. Geez, you hit puberty and your whole being changes! I had had my hair cut super short at the beginning of 9th grade, and it grew out CURLY, after being straight for 14 years. It is still curly, too. WTF?

6. It is almost painful to remember the pang of unrequited love. You all had serious crushes-why did it hurt so much? I am SO glad I don't have to go through all that again. I watch my students deal with the tides of "love" and thank god I'm not 14 anymore.

7. To show what a dork I was/am, I wrote a letter to my mom telling her I started my period. Bodily functions were never openly discussed in my house. The only Period Talk I got from my mother was in 5th grade. Mom said, "You know, there's pads under the sink if you ever need them." The Sex Talk was "Wait until you're in college to have a boyfriend." Thank god I was a reader and already knew all about the many ways of the vagina.

8. The book referenced in the Period Talk link is the exact one our school gave us in 1984/1985. It was the same book C's mother got when she was in school. What the hell were belts?!

9. On the way to the ski lodge for the Youth Fellowship ski trip, Jon lent me his Cramps tape. In between awesome songs, I heard him defend me to his hot friend Kevin, "Leave her alone, she's listening to The Cramps." I had a mild crush on Jon for a while, until he became a pot head. He did also expose me to The Descendents for the first time. Thanks, Jon, wherever you are!

10. I am totally tired of being sick. I have even lost my voice, which made for well-behaved students yesterday. We had a snow day today, and the prognosis is good for tomorrow. I may milk the Inability To Speak for a few more days.

FDOS=First Day of School

I wish I could scan the 2 pages that encompass June of my 8th grade year and September of my 9th grade year. The handwriting looks totally different. I can't imagine anything I did that summer to cause the change. I walked a LOT down to Carversville and Grandmom's house, but not on my hands!

Welcome to 9th grade, my friends. I am now officially in Senior Band.

Sept. 10th First Day of School!
Hi. I hate school! When I got on the bus, Daniel screamed at the top of his lungs BYE ALLISON! HAVE A NICE DAAAAAYYYYY!!!
I'll kill the bastard!
Well, there are some new girls who seem okay. One is on my bus. She's okay. ER, BW and BC are back. BW=Zit City. Well, Honors English is okay.
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1. Ah, the first day. Show off your new clothes and your new tan, everyone! I wish I could remember what I wore, cause I'm sure it was a fashion disaster. I had Mrs. Colby for Honors English in 9th grade, and she rocked my world. She was one of those teachers who totally make you feel like you're good at something.

2. My brother caught the elementary school bus until he was in 7th grade and I was a senior. Until senior year, I always worried that he would embarrass me every day as I boarded the bus. It was a valid fear.

3. The new girl, JT. later became a goody-goody. Supposedly, her family was Mormon or something, which would explain the millions of Taylor kids at our school. She was our valedictorian and won a four year scholarship to the Air Force. However, even though she sat next to me in Sex Education class, she ended up knocked up during her freshman year and had to flush Air Force dreams down the toilet. Idiot. She also briefly dated CV, who was the heart throb of our school. CV sat by me, Lex, Jason W. and later, Jon W. during homeroom. He's a big Myspace music guy now.

4. ER. had been in elementary school with us. I have few regrets in my life (well, more than a few), but one thing that shames me is how I treated her. She was nice enough, but if the popular girls in my peer group teased her, I quickly jumped in. After all, I was tired of being lowest on the totem pole. A couple times, we went over to each other's houses to play, and got along great. But at school, she was a different, snarly, defensive person. I WONDER WHY.
God, it is almost too embarrassing to write about how we teased her, and later H. I mean, there were several meetings in Principal Sonier's office, even!
I distinctly remember her saying she was going to be a grownup at age 12, because in Judaism, you're considered an adult after your mitzvah. Always the smart ass, I yelled back at her that since she was in America, she was an adult when she was 21 and could vote and drink.
Ugh. We were so horrible.
But when she returned to 9th grade, we were indifferent, if anything to her. I might remember her declaring in the locker room that she wasn't going to let us tease her anymore. Words that now, are direct lines of advice from her mom. Words that my own mother would have told me to say.
I can only hope that she is a well-adjusted 35 year old now, with a happy and healthy life.

5. El Burrito Loco for dinner=Super Yum!

Mine Eyes Have Seen The Glory of the Meme

Thanks Robin!

What were you doing 10 years ago?

Um. 1998? HA! Funny you should ask that. It was about the time my fiance broke up with me, so I was crying myself to sleep. Then, I took off to Cincinnati for the weekend to visit Kate and Bob. Basically, my life went to shit and I was living in St. Peters. I had to cram all my clothes into a printer box and stick it under my bed.

What were you doing 1 year ago?
Probably eating dinner or on the computer. Clearly nothing interesting.

Five snacks you enjoy:

1. Popcorn in any flavor
2. Cheese of any nationality, except Provel.
3. Clementines
4. Kit Kats
5. ice cream

Five songs that you know all the lyrics to:

1. You're So Vain by Carly Simon

2. Can I Get Get Get by Junior Senior

3. Hotel California by The Eagles

4. Back On The Chain Gang by The Pretenders

5. Horse With No Name by America

Five things you would do if you were a millionaire:

1. Donate lots of it.
2. Pay off my house.
3. Open up the Urban Craft Academy in the house for sale across the alley.
4. Get my grandparents set for the rest of their lives.
5. Tear down my garage and build a new one in a better alley-entry position

Five bad habits:

1. Procrastinating
2. Not really doing lesson plans, but copying from what I did last year at this time. Bev-tell no one :)
3. Entertaining negative thoughts.
4. Hoarding fabric.
5. Not walking the dog.

Five things you like doing:

1. Discussing Degrassi or doing Family Guy impressions with my students.
2. Eating/drinking.
3. Gardening.
4. Reading.
5. Sleeping

Five things you would never wear again:

1. Acid wash
2. White sneakers
3. Turtlenecks
4. Bike shorts under babydoll dresses. I'd wear babydoll dresses again, but over jeans. No Spandex.
5. oversized blazers

Five favorite toys:

1. Sewing machines

2. Mac Mini

3. Dog

4. Car

5. Hmmm. Does my garden count?

Jumping the Gun, Not Rope

I apologize for not reading ahead in my diary and finding that my earring was...removed...days after the George Michael/My Father/Porch Incident of '87. It is dim in my sewing room, and I can't see very well anyway!

May 29-Friday

Hi. H. is being a massive bitch. It is SO hot! I like JN! I finished Lisa's shorts.

June 2, 1987

Today I woke up to a nice little thunderstorm. The power was off at school for a while. It was neat. My ear is infected and I can't get the earring in. Help me!

June 11, 1987
So I'm irregular, give me a break. Funny events'
1. My bra thoroughly came undone in gym.
2. Today, L. had her Le Clic camera and BC took it and stuck it down his pants! And took a picture of course.

I have no earring in my right ear. I have to get it pierced again. There is a smallish lump in my ear. Very weird. EXAMS! I have been writing to Scott L. under my and on my English desk!
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1. Hmm...how come I "couldn't get the earring in"? I guess Mommie Dearest "removed" it, and I tried to put it back in. God, was I stupid.

2. Le Clic!! This incident happened during a break in our exam schedule. We were all funneled into the Old Gym, given sweet treats, and milled around for a while until our next exam. There was so much down time in school; it's a wonder we learned anything. Our teachers must have been drinking.

3. So I'm in English one day, and noticed someone wrote "hi" on the desk. So I replied with "hello". It evolved into a long desktop conversation, which led to me and this stranger leaving notes tucked into the crack where the desk's legs were bolted to the desk. On the last day of school, we revealed our names. It was a totally Good Clean Fun thing, nothing dirty. The guy who I had been writing to was a few grades above me. He was not the handsome stranger who would fall madly in love with scrawny, dorky me, as I had hoped. Scott L. actually lived up the road from me. He later became DJ Scott Lowe on WPST's "Post Modern PST" (seriously, why was this videotaped?) Friday night show, which Lex and I loved. Ah, The Happy Mondays.
And that was it. I thought maybe we'd talk over the summer, since we had quite a relationship via note. We discussed school, why people were such assholes, and how dumb the popular kids really were. But no, it ended in June.

4. My high school started AFTER Labor Day, which is why we were in school on June 11th. Next year, my first day of school is freakin' August 18th. Oh, how times have changed.

5. OMG! Dance to the radio!

6. I would be making $54,780 if I was teaching at my old high school. Christ! Then I could afford the $800,000 house down the street from Grandma.

7. Wasn't it weird how as kids we'd hang out by literally laying around your friend's room listening to the radio? Or, DANCING to the radio?

8. Now I am completely depressed and probably won't get a snow day tomorrow, either :(

Jump Rope? HA!

Since my belly is full of homemade mac and cheese, fish sticks and green beans, and is also surrounded by a nice layer of winter fat, the thought of jumping rope just tickles me to no end. As if!
It's a doubleheader tonight, as I am at a pivotal point in my earlobe's history here:

May 20, 1987
Spring Concert
Yesterday Jump Rope For Heart

Today Dad is in a bad mood because Mom didn't send in an ad for the kayak. Sometimes I want to be deaf and blind so I don't see or hear anything bad, but see and hear everything good. That would make the perfect person, you think?
Bye,
Tired Old Me

May 23, 1987
Hi. Mom and Dad are acting like normal human beings. Today Dad worked on the porch and I helped him. I majorly cleaned and not so majorly redid my room. Last Night I babysat Emily for Mrs. Hurst. They are rich compared to the Cowles. Emily is so sweet! I saw John (the baby). He has hair!



Ahhh....life with a short-tempered father and a forgetful mother.....So many times I wished I could run away, but I didn't have enough babysitting money saved up and I couldn't leave Dan behind.
So, the discussion:

1. Jump Rope For Heart? Yeah, I did it every year. That might be why I was always scrawny!

2. Kayak? When did we have a kayak?

3. John was the baby I used to babysit. The illegitimate one!

4. The Hursts and the Cowles were successive pastors of my church. The house they lived in, the parsonage, was truly haunted. My friend Kindra babysat when I couldn't, and she agreed with my fears. I'd see things moving in mirrors, weird lights, and a sense of never being alone with just a baby. It wasn't a bad feeling, just a bit unnerving.

5. Aaaannnddd.... helping Dad strip the paint off our porch. For some reason, I don't write that we were listening to the radio as we worked. Dad gave up having me scrape paint, and instead set me to work trying to get the piercing stud out of my very, very infected right earlobe.
It had gotten that way from babysitting, of course. During a game of catch with the Gerenser twins, I caught a ball to the right ear. It knocked the piercing stud out, and I STUPIDLY put it right back in, causing a massive gross infection.
Dad told me not to leave the porch until the earring got out.
So, as I was trapped with my conservative father, guess what song, very popular in 1987 came one? I'll give you a hint: when the singer "came out", it was no big surprise.
That's right, Laurene, "I Want Your Sex"!!
I tugged and tugged frantically at my poor ear as my father shook his head and said, "Jesus Christ, what kind of shit is this? Why can't you listen to decent music?"
"I hate this song too! It's so dumb!! Can I go inside?"
And with his blessing, I fled the scene.

Later on, my mother, NOT a nurse, performed bedroom surgery on me. We got the earring out alright! She held my ear lobe against my neck and gave the earring a good yank. A small piece of skin came with it. Thank god for endorphins and blacking out pain!

Those of you who don't know me may be surprised to know that after all that, I have 8 ear piercings and a belly button ring. But, believe me you, the last 7 earrings were done WITHOUT parental permission, WITHOUT my family doctor threading a needle and telling me to hold still, and WITHOUT any negative consequences, except for getting hollered at by Dad for getting more earrings.

And how weird that I found my old pastor's profile? I credit him with teaching me to ski.